Appraisal bloodbath

Is your appraisal over?

Yes? Then I’ll get back to you in a bit.

No?

When do you think it will happen?

Will your appraisal show your performance as being Excellent? VG? G? Avg(this year it is a new introduction)

How much do you think your increment will be? 10%? 15%? 20%? More? Less than 10%?NIL?

How has your company done this year? Has it made a profit? Has it made a loss? How much? Was the profit or loss in line with the projections made last year?

Do you even know?

Do you have answers for any of the questions above?

For reasons that I just can’t understand, most companies don’t have an appraisal system worth the name – which causes a great amount of anxiety and stress across the company.

You wake up in March, suddenly remembering that ‘appraisals’ are due. Is it an appraisal at all? Did you and your boss/HR manager (by the way, do you have an HR manager?) sit down, a year ago, and discuss what you would be appraised on? Did you, together, discuss your KRAs and define those areas where you needed to improve? BSC is such a glorious but completely wasteful exercise if done with no heart and one eye completely to please the top management!!

And can you, ever predict and say, “hey, I’ve done really well, I’ll get a great increment?”

No? And did you get (in some cases, “ever”)promoted? Did you have a clue what the promotion could mean to you? Do you rise to a new grade, which gives you better perks? The right to a better hotel room when you travel?

For those who are done with the appraisals and received/not received increment letters, did you really have an  appraisal? Is your increment really an increment?

For example, have you even thought of the fact that if you’ve got less than 10% increment, you’ve actually regressed – because inflation has been, in the last year, more than that? What about other people who haven’t got an increment at all?? God save them!!

And for those who are upset with the appraisals and the increments, do you know if the company has performed badly and cannot afford to award increments without endangering all of you working in it? Or if the company has made a profit, can afford increments, but that you failed to get one/get one that you expected because you didn’t bother about these questions at all?

To all the Harry Sadoos( managers/bosses) reading this, be sure that all your colleagues are asking themselves these questions now. It’s time this rubbish stopped.

The failure in setting up robust HR systems in a people business is the most irresponsible cause for the talent drain and worse creating nincompoops out of good performers. There are many a talented and deserving people who don’t get what they should and this is playing with their lives!!Criminal waste I would say…

It’s too late to do anything for this year, but it’s just perfect for fixing next year.

Do yourself a favour. Worry about this now, so you don’t stress out completely next year – as you’re doing now. Are you seeing a new job opportunity?? Go for it,boys & girls

My Lower berth

I am sure most of you (who've travelled in sleeper class) would have experienced this.

I normally book my tickets online at irctc.co.in. I travel to Hyderabad quite often and the train from Mumbai to Hyderabad is around 10.00pm. Its an ideal time since you can have your dinner and sleep off and find yourself at the destination next day afternoon. Tadaaa.

Anyway, when I book my tickets, I normally go for the upper berth but during that one odd trips, I prefer the lower berth. So there I was last time I travelled, all armed with my ticket for berth number 60 in coach S2 (lower berth). In comes the old-lady and woman-with-kid. Whoosh! There goes my lower berth before I could say “gone”. Sigh.

I know this must have happened to you guys too. I don't remember the last time I actually slept in a nice lower berth peacefully, without being looked at imploringly by people who want to take it away from me.

For the record, my parents are old enough to be given the privilege of lower berth and I understand totally about being kind with your berth. But, just once can I please have my berth? Sigh. Ok ok. I will climb up…

See, Not through your eyes!!

I live on the third floor of an apartment building. I use the lift, all the while thinking I should take the stairs, though that never happens. On this particular Sunday afternoon, I was going to get some stuff to eat from the nearby bakery(there was an exciting cricket match which will require some munchies). As the lift descended to the second floor,  there was a boy, not over 4, standing quite close to the lift doors. I thought he wanted to get in, but , he watched me intently and I stared back. Just as the lift doors were closing again, he spat on me. Yes, he SPAT on me. I saw him quickly run off to the right hand side. His spit hit bang on my right shoulder and I felt the wetness go through my T-shirt and touch my arms. I felt anger and sadness (for some reason) fill me as I reached the ground floor. As a woman looked at me curiously, wondering why I wasnt getting off, I asked her to get in and pressed the button that read two. Got off the floor and looked around.. My mind kept on saying 'you have to find him'. I walked towards the right hand side of the lift (the direction where the boy ran off) and suddenly caught a glimpse of him moving towards the stairs and running up. He hadn't seen me. I climbed up behind him and found him standing the exact same way near the lift door and waiting for the next victim. I caught him by the ear (something I have never ever done) and looked down at him. He tried to wriggle out and said in perfect english "I am sorry uncle, I will not do it again". I was not convinced, I wanted to be sure. I caught him by the wrist and asked him to take me to his flat. He was terrified and I could feel his pulse beating so hard against his tiny wrist I had a tight grip on. I asked him if he goes to school, is this the way he behaves there, this is how street kids behave and I haven't had an experience like this even from them. He kept on repeating that he will not do it again and maintained silence when I asked him his flat number. I had a firm grip on his wrist and insisted he take me to his house. His eyes turned red and I expected him to cry. He didn't. I kept on repeating 'take me to your house' and after around 2-3 mins (though it felt much longer, I am sure it wasn't) he said 'fifth floor , flat number 504'. That's when he gave up and he knew this monster of a man was going to bring disgrace to him and his parents and he is going to be grounded for some time. I walked with him to his flat and rang the bell. He strongly shook off my grip and this time, I let go. I asked him "what's your name?", trying to bring in some gentleness to my voice. His face was set in a very angry and determined manner as he mumbled 'Sumit'. He still didn't cry.

His dad opened the door and he ran in to one of the rooms. The dad looked at me and smiled curiously. There was a girl not over 2 years, sitting on the sofa and smiling toothlessly at me. His Dad welcomed me to his house( I then wondered that living in apartments we really dont know many of our own neighbors) and on the drawing room I saw a big family picture that had the little boy along with his little sister happily posing with their parents and the photo next to the family picture was of the “Lady of the house” picture that was garlanded. I was dumbstruck.Sumit’sdad mentioned that she died last year in an accident and the children are missing her a lot.They moved in recently to this apartment to forget the memories attached in the previous house with her.

I looked at the father's face and said "I saw Sumit standing near the lifts and he looked a little upset. I was just worried whether he was lost so thought I will bring him back." He gave me a wide smile and said 'thank you very much' as I stepped out of the house and walked towards the lift again.

This was the moment of truth for me. I have realized that there is a story in every face you see and Sumit’s story was of “I miss my MOM”. The spit wasn’t hurting me anymore…

My Top 3 (DD) serials

My addiction to TV started when I was in school (some time in 1984).The only channel that broadcasted news, entertainment and educational programs was DOORDARSHAN.

  If today someone gives me the power to roll back time, I have a few things to do. And the first thing would be going back to the days when Doordarshan aired those lovely serials. They were pure, unadulterated and had a strong storyline with very good script. More importantly, you can watch them with your family.

Yes, I miss them, believe me we all do miss them. I remember, Doordarshan was the only channel when I was kid, and there was only one television in the street. Yes you are reading it right – in the whole street.

One of the advantages of those serials (and one television) was you get to know your neighbors very well. It was a community affair when Chayageet, Mahabharat, Ramayan, He-Man, Sunday movies were telecast. All the kids were made to sit on the floor and the adults occupied the chairs and sofas.

 Another advantage of only one channel was that you could discuss it with your friends in school knowing they would have watched the same thing, not like the present day situation when you ask a friend whether he saw the match and he will reply ‘Nahi big boss dekh raha tha’.

Let me bring back those lovely memories, the time when we were kids, the time when  doing homework was the most difficult task, when the Sunday movie on TV was the most anticipated event of the week,   the time when face and books were different things(unlike FACEBOOK now), the time when friends didn’t know each other by the number of PS2,Beblettes  and other computer games they own  and the time when news meant only one hour of news(remember Salma Sultan,Rini Khanna,Usha Albequerue,Avinash Kaur -Sarin later – funny that I remember only the ladies,what about men – was it Shammi Narang, Tejeshwar Singh,Rajiv Mehrotra?)) and not the Tamasha(with a lot of sensationalism and zero journalism) they have now degenerated to(Sansani!!!).Even the news for the impaired,news in sanskrit were a result of high class programming!!

TV programs were then a reflection of our culture, source of information of our rich heritage and a medium to provide education.The government was the caretaker of the type of visual material that was allowed to be shown to the Indian public.Now with all the media freedom given,the visual material has slipped quite a few notches…

Some of the serials that had the highest impact on me (and audience generally) are:

1.) Malgudi Days

Everything was just perfect. The village, the goats (even they knew how to act much better than the current saas and bahu), the kids, the houses, the roads, the ladies. The title track was just awesome “Taa Na Na Na Ta Na Na Na Re” (even now some have it as their ringtone). The cartoons were by the famous R.K. Laxman. Without going more into the technical details, I would just like to re-live those days, the feeling and the art of storytelling. The writer shows how to produce stories out of nowhere. Then there was Swami(Master Manjunath, now a corporate manager in real life) and his late night adventures in his father’s office. Those were the child artistes who can make the most matured ones acting in the current “Saas Bahu” serials feel silly. The cricket match (Swamy and his friends), the way his friends just hang round ,their small quarrels were all so absorbing and life-like.

And the all credit goes to “R.K. Narayan”.

2.) Nukkad

It (Street Corner) was the name of a popular TV serial that aired on the Indian Television channel somehwere in1986 - 87. It was co-directed by Kundan Shah and Saeed Akhtar Mirza, starring Dilip Dhawan, Rama Vij, Pavan Malhotra, Sangeeta Naik, Avtaar Gill in lead roles.

The serial dealt with the struggles of urban youth,some of the iconic characters were - Dilip Dhawan - Guru (The Electrician) ,Avtar Gill - Qadir Bhai (The Hotelier) , Khopdi (The Drunk) ,Haider Ali - Raja ,Javed Khan - Karim Hajaam (The Barber) , Pavan Malhotra - Hari (Bicycle-repair guy) ,Sangeeta Naik - Radha ,Rama Vij - Teacherji (The Educator) ,The police constable -  Ganpat Hawaldar  and some more

This serial was a trend setter in the way Mumbayya language was spoken,the feeling of oneness in the Nukkad community ,happiness shared on the festivals and the lessons learnt by the characters every episode was an example of wholesome entertainment. Every episode ended with a life changing lesson for one of the characters.The way the love story of Guru and Teacherji was depicted, signified  of their silent romance for each other and no direct words spoken ever!!

3.) Yeh Jo Hai Zindagi

The episodes revolved around funny happenings in the lives of Ranjit Verma (played by actor Shafi Inamdar) and Renu Verma (played by actress Swaroop Sampat, a former Miss India 1979), who play a married couple along with Renu's unmarried and unemployed younger brother Raja (Rakesh Bedi). Other characters were Ranjit's boss (Tiku Talsania), his Bengali neighbours (actors Vijay Kashyap and Sulabha Arya), etc.

A trademark of the show were the characters played by Satish Shah. In each episode, Shah played a different character who somehow played a key role in the plot. These characters would be from various professions and various regions of India, with some being close family friends of the Vermas and others being total strangers. During the mid-1980s Satish Shah was the undisputed "King of Comedy" as a direct consequence of the multitude characters that he played on the show.

Now,lets see what could be the top 3 serials of this generation

1)    Kaun Banega Crorepati

2)    Bigg Boss

3)    Khatron ke Khiladi

All three are reality shows,giving big cash prize for the winners – so now it is all about a lot of juicy and shocking footages of fisticuffs,abuses(Bigg Boss),a lot of money at stake and nothing to do with our rich Indian heritage,culture(the only saving grace- KBC – anchored by Amitabh himself)