Dream, we must!!!

This topic came, not in my dream, but while reading HBR that was given by my boss a few days back. HBR article mentioned how practicing in dreams can improve one’s performance. A research mentioned that when people imagine practicing a skill or sport during ”lucid dreaming”, the state in which a sleeping person recognises he’s in a dream and takes control of it, their performance in that activity improves in real life. Astounding, I thought and absurd some may say!!! Some 50 years ago, Martin Luther King Jr. delivered that historic speech “ I have a dream…”(if any one of you haven’t heard or read that speech ,then you should).Eventually, America found their first Afro-American President in Barack Obama.What is significant here is that this dream was not dreamt during best of times but to the contrary was in worst of times.(when the blacks didn’t even have the voting rights) Nearer, here in India, in 1999, when our telephony and communication systems were pathetic, Dhirubhai Ambani dreamt of a digital India that was affordable to the common man(a mobile call at the cost of a post card was the brief given to the Reliance project team) With every product, service costing more and more, Ratan Tata dared to dream of a NANO. Mahatma Gandhi dreamt of a free India when our country was enslaved for more than 3 centuries.. Dream we must, that we all know. What needs to be taken from this is that dreams processed by these great men were during the most troubled or testing times. And, on the sheer strength of their dreams, people, organisations and countries stood by them to make their dreams come true.. Come, let us dream and let the sheer strength of our dreams make the world stand by us…

Human tendencies

We feel irritated by bores or fools and have little patience with those whose opinions differ from ours. Nonetheless we put up with them because we don’t want to hurt their feelings. But there are some who have no such inhibitions, and a few who actually seem to take a perverse pleasure in showing their resentment openly, particularly when they know that, because of their higher positions, they themselves are immune from the same treatment Take for example one of my previous bosses. Whenever HE was on a tour, we used to feel relieved as we could have a cup of coffee and a bit of chit chat (which was at such a premium when HE was around) but then HE would make it a point to call up any of our desk phones & not hand phones just to make sure we were sitting and working and not wasting our time. That used to irk us no end. Calling at odd hours and demanding an update of an ongoing project was HIS pet pastime.To keep us on our toes all the time(including potty time) gave HIM perverse pleasure. Why is it symptomatic of people who are in position power? To have people at their beck and call gives them a high. A boss making his subordinates wait for a meeting is a sign of rudeness, lack of respect for other people’s time and his own indiscipline. What we all need irrespective of our position, caste or creed is mutual respect and tolerance.There is so much that we TALK and so little that we DO. Let us co-exist with dignity, love and peace.

Blogging - Passion or a chore?

Blogging - Passion or a chore? Writing one blog a month is what I had committed to myself. I managed to do that for quite some time and then I lost my commitment to this blog writing. Then, I told myself – “If I missed one month, I will write 2 blogs the next month and make up for the blank that I drew the last month.” I started writing on this basis. Slowly, I skipped 2 months without blogging. I said to myself – “That’s ok, I will make up next month by writing 3 blogs” My targets kept increasing and what I started as a passion turned into a painful chore. I then realised what I was doing. I started to cheat myself by making wrong commitments .If I make a wrong commitment to myself then how will I ever make commitments to others and honour my word? Now, this is what is bugging me. I hope to correct myself and start writing blog every month. This is a new beginning… Happy Dussehra to you all.

Issue based not person based

When parents say – “you got 65% marks in maths, that’s bad!!! No TV for you for the rest of the year”. At no point in time they meant  - “I don’t love you”. What they have rejected is your actions and not YOU.

Let us study this common occurrence in the Indian culture -

Girl gets married to a boy and then takes up the duties in her new house. One of those duties is say – cooking.She prepares dal, curry and chapatis.Curry is spicy and the boy’s family doesn’t eat spicy food.The first reaction after eating the curry from the boy’s mother – “what spicy curry , we don’t prepare it like this!!!”. The girl starts thinking – what is this? Whatever I do they don’t like, on the contrary the mother-in-law also starts thinking – what a girl we chose, she doesn’t even know how to cook.

In all this, we need to remember that what needs to be rejected is the ACTION and not the PERSON. This will liberate us from the false imagery that we tend to make and stop being judgemental.

When a salesman tries to sell his product to customers, they will have reasons not to buy – high price, they don’t feel its need, they are happy with the product of another company and many such reasons.When they reject the product, they are not rejecting the sales person, are they?

A giel straightens her hair and asks her boyfriend for a feedback and he says – “You looked gorgeous when your hair was curly “.The girl gets upset and starts sulking and stops talking her boyfriend.What has her boyfriend done here? On asked for a feedback, he gave his opinion, he never said – “I don’t love you anymore”. So, he rejected her action of straightening and not HER.

Life is simpler when we understand that  rejection is of  the ACTIONs and not the PERSONs.

Good or Bad

There is so much of “bad” in this world that we can easily find them , point them out and also make a list of them…

There are shortcomings in an organisation, family, individual. Any idiot can find out the mistakes/faults , it is not a great achievement to find these faults.

It takes an able and noble minded person to find out the GOOD in a person/organisation/family. It takes a lot to acknowledge another person’s goodness,isn’t it?

What I can see through my bedroom window on a rainy day is either the fresh green trees or the muddy slush created from the rain water. I need to choose what I want to see from my window of life. I will see only what I want to see.

There is so much goodn in the worst of people and there is so much of bad in the best of people.What do we want to see through the spectacle that is our mind??

I take a resolve to be a habitual good finder than be a fault finder. And  You?

Written today by Krishna Pendyala for Sri Chandresekhar Nair(Daffodil)

MY RESOLVE

To plan for what you want 10 years from now is foolhardy; to not know what you want by the end of this year is again, foolhardy!!!

What’s important is to understand our objectives, measure them, track them, keep them realistic, specific.

Goals and Objectives are never ambitious, timelines are ambitious.

My resolve is to see worth in other people and make them aware of their worth.

In my times of despair,  God was always there in the form of a human soul to support,push , drive and showed me the way.There were times when I didn’t trust my abilities but I always found a few others who trusted in my abilities more than me.I have reached to this position and place not on my own steam alone but others’ belief in me..

Now, its my turn to give the world what the world has given to me.BELIEF…

Till they find their self-thur, I will be their thrust, till they find their self-belief, I will be their self-belief

I will be that propelling force that will show them that are better than they think they are.The world helped me see my future, I will now help the world see theirs….

A letter to my BIL on his 5oth bday

19/2/2013 = 1X9 X2 +20+13 = 51 ---> completed 50 and entering into 51

OR

19/2/2013 = 19-2+20+13 = 50  --->  completed 50

Dear BIL,

My association with you started when my lovely sister got engaged to you.

I still remember the day vividly when as a marriage custom, I placed the jaggery under your chin to cajole you not to go when u were ready to walk with ur stick and umbrella:) Now, on your 50th birthday , I am swelling with pride to tell that my BIL hasn't changed from the BIL I always knew- my 23 adjectives/nouns for you will be hopefully apt to describe you -

1.helpful,2.cheerful, 3 health conscious, 4 highly intelligent 5. Practical

 6 philosopher7friend 8 guide to many 9. Supportive 10 forthright

11 caring12 family man 13 thirsty to learn 14 studious 15 never say die  attitude

16 young at heart 17 loving parent 18 hard working 19 god seeking

 20 tradition loving 21 Movie buff 22 food lover 23 great traveller

Why did I mention 23 and not 50 traits of urs??

It's bcos of my association with u is now in its 23 rd year:)

 Have happiness and health life long

Have a rocking Golden Jubilee year....

Yours lovingly,

 bil

2nd anniversary of my blog

Today , I have completed 2 years in the blogging world.

Neeraj Nigam, thanks for igniting the spark in me to start blogging.

When I started , I didnt have any idea on what I will write and how I will retain the interest in me to continue blogging.

In my 24 months of blogging, I have written 45 blogs including this one.My topics of blogs started with personal experiences and then gradually shifted to my views on certain topics and some that are more philosophy oriented and some just plain fun and imaginary situations.

 I have thoroughly enjoyed my experience and will continue to enrich myself by expressing my views.

Family, friends who have read my blogs have given their feedbacks that have helped me to do better.

Thanks for all the encouragement and feedback!!

I am sure , this year, will be a better learning curve in my budding blogging graph.Maybe more of photo blogging this time:)

take care ,guys

Different paths, different results…

Anyone can be one among the crowd. The joy of living life is is in standing above the crowd, and in walking a different path.It’s a choice you have to make. Make the decision right now.Do you want to be just anybody in life, or do you want to be somebody in life?

If you live life like everybody,you will become like everybody.Walk the path like everybody walks and you’ll reach the same destination as everyone.Walk a different path and you will reach a different destination for yourself.

If you keep thinking the same way, you will keep doing the same stuff.If you keep doing the same stuff, you will keep getting the same results.Expecting your life to change without changing the pattern of your thoughts is immaturity.Doing the same stuff but expecting newer results is sheer ignorance.

Its a cause and effect syndrome.If I have to reach where I have never reached,then I will have to take the path that I have never taken.If I have to achieve what I have never achieved,then I will have to do the things that I have never done before.If I have to accomplish what no one has ever accomplished ,then I will have to do what no one has ever done.

If you cannot run ahead of others, then run a completely different path and also hope that sometime in future, people will run behind you.